Waiting for Christian

It has been a while since I have posted anything on my blog.  I have sent emails to friends, and posted updates on facebook but haven't written here in over a month.  On August 24th I got pictures of a precious little boy that is now officially my "referral"!  His name is Christian Enam Gentry, and I am already in love with him.  He was abandoned in the Congo without a name or birth certificate, but someone started calling him Christian.   I think his name is wonderful and all I could think was..."I prayed and prayed for God to bring me the right child, and he sent me a Christian!!".  I thought about using family for his middle name, but decided I really wanted him to have his African heritage in his name.  So, I searched for African names that had a powerful meaning, would be easy to pronounce and would flow with Christian.  Enam is what I chose, and it means 'Gift from God'!  Perfect!!!

Now...what comes next?  The attorney is working on an official document called an abandonment decree, and then he will have to have a birth certificate "created". The do not know his exact age, but estimate between 2 and 3.   Next, a court date will be appointed where the attorney will have power to finalize the adoption for me in the Congo.   Prayerfully this will be sometime in the next 2 or 3 months.   After the adoption is final, the paperwork goes to the Embassy to get Christian a passport, visa and immigration approval.  This takes another couple of months.  THEN I get to go get him!!  Woo hoo!  It is my prayer that it will be no longer than March when I can go get him.   I long to have him here!  I am ready to continue this journey with his sweet face!  I know it is going to be HARD, but it will also be the most rewarding experience of my life!

I thank you so much for all of your prayers, and ask you to continue to pray!  
Love,
Cindy

Jesus Loves the Little Children

This summer has been consumed with mostly filling out paperwork for grants.  I have now submitted grant applications to Lifesong for Orphans and Show Hope.  It doesn't sound like much, but they are very intensive.  Copies of W-2's, income tax returns, reference letters, essays on my faith and on why I want to adopt, cash flow worksheets, and itemized statements of all of assets and liabilities.  Whew..... I pray that God blesses me with some money from one or both.  But, even if He doesn't, He will provide in other ways.   I have also been at work on creating T-shirts to sell and those will be revealed very soon on facebook!!  I am very excited about them:-).

This weekend has brought good news to me.  I was able to have dinner with the couple who is directing the orphanage in Jamaica on Thursday night.   They are home for a break between year 1 and 2 of their mission.   They said that my little man there is doing great and he is starting to potty train..YAY!  They also feel pretty confident that I will eventually get to bring him home.  There has been another case-worker to take over all of the children's files at Robins Nest, and she is working diligently to do what is best for these children.   She is aware of me and knows I want this little man, and I will be calling her on Monday to introduce myself and make sure she can put a voice with a name.

I was also able to attend the annual reunion for Celebrate Children (the agency I am using for the Congo)  tonight, and got to meet several of the people who I have had email communication with.   I found out that there are only 3 FAMILIES ahead of me who are wanting little boys.   They actually want infant boys, and I am good with the age up to 3 years old.  So, if a toddler boy becomes available first, then I may get the call first.   I feel like it will be a matter of weeks before I get a referral!!  WOW!!  Praise the Lord! ......and get me some bunk beds, because I think 2 boys are coming my way!!!  What an amazing journey!    I know I have no idea how hard this is going to be and how much my life is about to change, but I also KNOW this is the right thing!  I am walking in God's will for my life and these little people will bring so much joy to everyone they meet!

The reunion tonight was awesome!!  I was sitting in large dining room full of children with all color skin.  It was beautifully diverse.....ethiopia, guatemala, china, united states were all represented....at all different ages.  What an amazing sight!   I felt like singing aloud, "Jesus Loves The Little Children"!

Keep praying for this process, for the grants, and especially for these 2 little men that are miles away tonight.   Pray they are well loved, taken care of, healthy, not going hungry, and that God is preparing their hearts to meet me, their MAMA!!

Blessings,
Cindy

Journey Takes A Curve!

There were many reasons for choosing Jamaica, not the least of which is that God opened the door, and used a trip to start this whole process.   But, another appeal for Jamaica is that the cost is SIGNIFICANTLY less.   Like  $8000 compared to $25,000.  This is because there really isn't a country fee, and they do use agencies, so there is no agency fee.  This positive has turned into a negative.  There is no advocate over there working on my behalf so things just continue to move extremely slow (or not at all).

I have been contemplating all of my options and after doing A LOT of research, emailing, and reference checking....I made a decision to contract with an agency and I am seeking to adopt from the Democratic Republic of Congo in Africa.   I am THRILLED!!  There are waiting children there so this process should move much more quickly.  Within a year, prayerfully.  And I get to travel to Africa and bring him home.  HOW AWESOME IS THAT!!   A ONCE IN A LIFE EXPERIENCE!

One of the most difficult parts of this decision was the fear of going against what God has for me and being convinced that I have a son in Jamaica.  So, I am NOT pulling my paperwork from Jamaica.  If God has a son for me there, and I eventually get a call from them telling me he is ready...then I will just have two little boys.  What a blessing!!  Still praying for the "little man" in the pictures.

Another hard decision was worrying about the financial responsibility that comes with the program.  I had a peace in church on Sunday morning that said...I can do this.    The money we have is not ours anyway, it is a blessing from God and HE will provide.    It is not like I am taking all of that money and buying a sports car or a bigger house, I am giving a child a home and really saving a life!  Plus...I get to be a mama! YAY!!

I will have some fundraising opportunities in the next few months, so stay tuned in!!!

Thank you for walking this journey with me!
Love,
Cindy

God Has A Plan

It has been a while!!   I want to send an update even though I don't have any exciting news.   The last few calls to Jamaica over the last month have not been very positive.   I sit and wonder if this will ever happen??   Most international adoptions are conducted through agencies, so there is someone in the middle being an advocate for you.  Jamaica does not work with agencies.  This is good, in that the cost is so much lower, but bad in that I have to deal directly with the government myself and they are not willing to give any information.  They just tell me "I am on the waiting list and they will let me know when there is an available child for me".   It is very frustrating, mostly because I have a fear of waiting 2 or 3 years and never getting a referral.

So...the wheels start turning.   I have been considering other avenues.  There are almost no other countries who allow singles to adopt.   I have considered going the birth mother route through the states, but I am not quite there yet.  I have always felt that my little one would be a 3 - 5yrs old.   On Sunday, I googled "Caribbean Adoption" and found a site with waiting children.  There was a picture of a beautiful sibling group of a girl and boy from Haitie.  They are 1.5 and 2.5 yrs old.  They are precious!!   However, when I called the Holt agency, I found out that even though they are waiting and available...the process through Haiti is still going to take 2 - 3 years.  On top of that, they do not speak english and the cost would be around $25,000.

For those of you who wonder, I have called Children Services in Nashville and have searched for available children in the states, and they are all older children which is not what God has put in my heart.

So, where am I today???  I am back to my resolve of waiting on Jamaica!!  This is where God lead to begin and I truly have to put my trust in the fact that HE has a plan!   There has to be a reason that I am going to have to wait.    I will continue to pray and save money and prepare my heart for the day that Jamaica calls to tell me my son is ready to come to his forever home!

Thank you for sharing in my journey!
Love,
Cindy

Waiting.....

I feel like this will be my title for many, MANY months to come.  But, I have gained a peace about the waiting process that I didn't have before.  I realize that fretting and worrying is not going to speed up the process nor is it going to change the outcome.  God also plainly tells us to not worry about tomorrow.  So, I wait!   I wait for the phone call or email to come.  I have found out that "little man's" file is back in the parish of St. James and I am not certain if the investigation has actually started.  I have been reminded that there is no guarantee that he will be mine.  But, I just had a few new pictures tagged on facebook of him, and my heart wants to burst open.  Absolutely beautiful.....as they all are!!  

I wanted to give a short update just so you know what is going on in the process.  I go on with my life knowing that I will visit again either this summer or early fall, and continue to pray daily!  Please continue to pray with me.
Cindy

Roller Coaster!

My last post was not very encouraging, but since then, I actually got some good news!!   On Friday, April 1st, I called the CDA office in the region where the little man was born and spoke again with his original case-worker.   She remembered who I was and knew the child I was calling about without me even having to say his name.  That alone was huge in my book.   She then told me that they have opened an investigation to find his birth parents to try and get them to legally terminate rights.  If they are not able to find them, they will then run an ad in the paper trying to find any family for 6-8 weeks, I believe.  If no one comes forward at that point, the courts can legally terminate rights!!   I can wait!  I can wait as long as I know there is movement toward making this happen.   If I ever get to hear the words....."he will be your child"....I will go visit him many times until I get to bring him home!

I have my appointment at immigration on Friday the 15th to have my fingerprints done for my I600A.    This is one of my final steps in the paperwork journey.

 I am finding this to be a bit of an emotional roller coaster...but it will be SO WORTH the ride!!  Please continue to pray for me and this whole process whenever you feel led to do so!

God is Good!
Cindy

2 Steps forward, 1 Step Back.

Things were moving so smoothly!  Some might say..too smoothly.  Well, I hit a bump on Friday that left me sitting at my desk at school, crying my eyes out, during my lunch break.    My adoption case-worker (Ms. OConnor) is only in the Montego Bay office on Wednesdays.  So, I began trying to reach her during any break I could find during the day to get an update.  I finally reached her on Friday at another office.   She quickly informed me that little man is not available for adoption right now, and that I am NOT allowed to identify the child I would like to adopt myself.    Okay...I know you are asking...what does that mean??  Well, it means that although he has been in the care of the government since he was at least 6 months old, that they have never gotten the family to legally terminate rights.  CRAZY!!  He has been abandoned for 2.5 years and the parents still have to be located and rights have to be terminated.   What is even more frustrating, the name of his parents are in his file and the area where they were living is less than an hour away from their office???  AAAHHH!!    The birth certificate also appears to missing, however, we also know the hospital in which he was born.   So....as much as I would love to fly down there and take-over...I just can't!!   It is out of my control and I HAVE to let God take care of it.

So, where does that leave me today?   I have decided to take a few steps back and get myself back into the place of peace that I was in before I went to Jamaica.  I want the child that God has for me.  Not the one that I pick out for myself.   God is completely in control and knows who and when the timing is right!   I have to stop staring at his picture everyday and prepare my heart for the phone call telling me they have a son for me!!  I am anxiously awaiting that day and will love him with all of my heart.

On a sweet note, my students came back from lunch to see me in pieces.  I quickly scurried to the restroom to get myself together.  Several of my girls followed me in and hugged me from all sides.  So precious!  One of them went and told several other teachers to check on me.   They are really such loving kids and I am blessed to have them in my life!

Please keep praying and I will keep you posted!
Cindy

Back to routine!

Tomorrow is the beginning of the last 9 weeks of school, and God has to give me the strength to get busy with teaching my kiddos.  It is going to be difficult to get my mind out of Jamaica, but it is really out of my hands at this point except to pray and call every week to check on the progress.

Cute stories with little man..

I was trying to spend some one-on-time with him by taking him to the playground.  As we were walking there, we passed some of the older kids playing.   Little man kept saying "Da-ko-ta", "Da-ko-ta"...over and over. I asked him if we could swing...and I said PLease...and he would repeat...peeeesseee.  Then "dakota".   Finally, I took him back to where the big kids were and realized they were riding SKOOTERS!!  LOL.  He was saying The Skoo Ter!   So precious.

Then...there was a dog laying around asleep, and pointed at her and said  "nap-time", "nap-time".  :-))

I also survived my first temper tantrum.   He was mad at me because I couldn't keep picking him up to put the basketball in the goal.  I am a weakling.   I let him cry it out and told him he could come sit in my lap.  After a very short time, he walked over and plopped down in my lap and put 2 fingers in his mouth.   My heart melted~!!!

Needless to say, I am praying and going to fight to bring this little man home.  I am purposely leaving his name off for now, because I think it is best until I know something for sure.

Please continue to PRAY for speed and for "little man" with the great big smile!!

Blessings!
Cindy

Wednesday Arrived!!

Thank you all for your prayers!!   I truly felt like I and Ms. O Connor were covered today!!  I had my meeting this morning, and I feel that it went very well.   I should start by telling you that our trip to Robin's Nest yesterday was amazing.  I did make a special bond with a beautiful little boy, but I am not sure yet if he is available for adoption or if he is the son God has for me.  I met with Ms. O Connor (my case worker and adoption officer) this morning, and she said that I am approved, all of my paperwork is in order and that I am now on the list for her to find a son for me.  She IS going to check into the background of the "little man" I met yesterday, but I am going to keep my heart open to whoever God puts in my life!!   I am so EXCITED and feel like that the process is well on its way now!   Katie and I got enjoy some beach time today, a bon-fire on the beach tonight and more playing all day tomorrow.  40 has started out in a BIG way.

I do have tell a funny on myself.  I was so anxious about my meeting this morning, that when I left the room for breakfast all dressed and ready to go....I made it 10 steps before looking down and realizing I still had to hotel slippers on.  LOL....We chuckled all day about that.

I will be back on Friday and will share more of my experience at Robin's Nest at that point.  It you want to look at their website, it is www.robinsnestchildrenshome.org

Blessings!
Cindy

24 hours!!

As I sit here drinking my coffee, I can't believe I will be on the plane in 24 hours.  Normally, I would have had my bags packed with all my tanning stuff and sun dresses, but right now I have nothing prepared to go except for my binder full of documents for the CDA.   Amazing how different, and yet wonderful, this trip to Jamaica is!!   Yes...Katie and I WILL have some much needed relaxation and girl time amidst taking care of business.

To answer a question I am getting a lot...I do not have a child identified yet.  That is called a referral, and it doesn't take place until more approval has happened.  It is my prayer, that when the officer (Ms O Connor) sees that I have all my documents in place, she will be willing to discuss available children with me.  In my home study, we just put my preference is a little boy up to age 36 months!

I guess I better get off the couch and start figuring out what I need to pack and what I need to pick up at Target today:-).   Thank you so much for your continued prayers, ESPECIALLY at 9AM central time on Wednesday morning!!
Cindy

Getting Ready

Tomorrow is the home visit for my home-study.   I have installed 2 new fire alarms, bought a new fire extinguisher and bought kiddie locks for the kitchen and bathroom cabinets.  Cleaned and cleaned today and I am ready to show my house.  I cannot wait until I am ready to start decorating his new bedroom!!  That is going to be FUN!  I am thinking green and yellow where I can put a Jamaican flag on the wall and of course we can still have some Green Wave decor!

After the visit, I have to head to the bank to get 4 more documents notarized, then to get passport pictures and I may be finished with all of my paperwork at that point.   Whew....That is until something gets lost in the mail and I have to send it all over again.   I pray for everything to go smoothly.  (Not sure what the passport pictures are for since I already have a passport, but it is one of the things on the list).

If you feel inclined, it be wonderful it you would pray for me, the trip, and my future son.   Pray for our safety, pray for the government officials to have open hearts, pray the process goes quickly, pray that I have patience, pray for son's health and sweet personality.   I would love it if you would put my name on a post-it on your bathroom mirror and pray for me when you brush your teeth everyday!   Prayer is Powerful!

Thank you!
Cindy

March 1st

Well this is my first go at a blog!

I thought it would be a great way to keep a written account of my journey to find my son!  I want to start at the beginning.  I had a brother, Tim, who died in 1991 from Muscular Dystrophy.  His was a sex-link disease, which means that the male children can get the diseased X chromosome, and the female could be a carrier of the X.  I always knew that there was a 50/50 chance that I was a carrier and that I would be tested when I was married and ready to have children.  So all through high school and college, I knew that adoption could very well be a part of my future.

Jump forward to being married in 1998, tested and found out that I wasn't a carrier, and divorced in 2001 with no children from that marriage.   I have always felt blessed by God that I have never been one of those women who felt like her life was not complete if she didn't give birth to a child.    However, there was a seed planted for adoption years ago that has come up again and again, but it was never God's timing.   Throughout my 16 years of teaching, I have come to realize that there is a special place in my heart for the young black boys that I have taught.  I have always bonded with them and I have felt like it was a great experience for them know that a white, female teacher loved them unconditionally.    In fact, a former colleague of mine (a black coach), once told me that my relationship with those boys was a blessing!  One of the best complements I have ever received. (Thank you Jack Pittman!)   So, at least 6 years ago I went to my first adoption meeting just to find out what it was all about.  I read books, researched, talked to people, and PRAYED!   I wasn't ready at that point in my life.   I would go out on 1st dates, and tell the person that I wanted to adopt a little black boy one day:-).   My friend said..."and he didn't call you back"? LOL!  Yeah...a little heavy for a first date, but obviously a seed in my heart.

 I considered Ethiopia, Haiti, America and gave great thought about each and it just never felt right.   Very recently, I went through yet another heartbreak relationship and I learned so much about myself and what I really want in life!   Then at Thanksgiving, my friend Katie's husband mentioned sending me and Katie on a tropical trip for spring break.  A 40th birthday present.  So sweet!!   The ball started rolling and God has just said yes, yes, yes.   Next, we were going to Jamaica for a girls trip and going to take a small side journey to visit an orphanage.  Yes, you heard it, and orphanage!!  Wow...it is falling into place.  After researching, praying, phone calls, etc....I sent in my pre-adoption paperwork to the CDA in Jamaica.    Okay..so now here comes a God moment for sure.  I knew I had to have a home-study done and got the name of Catholic Charities from a friend.   I googled and found a random number and called someone named Julie.  Well, Julie didn't answer...Leigh did.  After a few minutes of conversation she realized who I was and it turns out she was senior at Brentwood Academy when I started teaching there. I believe that was just another confirmation!!    I am READY to share my home, my life, and my love with my son!  I know he is out there!

So, where is the process today?  Paperwork, paperwork and more paperwork.  I just about have everything collected on my part.  The home-study will be complete next week and the I600A will be sent to Immigration.  I am leaving for Jamaica on the 14th and have an appointment with the adoption officer at 10AM on the 16th.   I pray that I get more information at that time and specifically would be so happy to get his name and face!!    The process could take as long as 2 years, but I just have a feeling that it is going to move more quickly.    My daddy does too, and daddy's are never wrong...right??